Friday, September 3, 2010

Negativity


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Since I can remember, I was inundated with negativity. My father is the most negative person in the world. But he would say, "I probably wouldn't win that award because it's probably some popularity contest, and even if I did win, the prize is probably worthless, or would be the wrong size, or I had one already."

From an early age, I tended to have a Pollyanna attitude towards life. Pollyanna became my inner voice. As an adult, I am often shocked by negative people. I don't know why their negativity shocks me as much as it does, but I am always surprised.

My inner voice is really what keeps me going among the most depressing and negative times in my life, especially things I cannot control. I am often saying to my kids, "You cannot control other people, but you can control how you respond." When situations happen that are beyond my control (hubby losing his job, kids having neuro issues, cats peeing on my clothes, etc.) I remember that I can only control how I respond to those things. When I am faced with free pizza at work, I need to remember that it WILL make me sick.

Now, when I am faced with mean, nasty, lonely old men who like to stalk me and call me mean names, I laugh it off. My inner voice says, "We sheesh! At least you don't look like HIM! Really, you are making good choices every day. No one is forcing you to walk, you are choosing to. That old man is very unhealthy. You are making strides towards never being like him. You go girl! You ROCK! He is mean because he's jealous of you. I mean, you are totally awesome. He doesn't like you? Well it's because you won't share your awesome self with him!" I am SOOOO in love with my inner voice! She rocks!

I guess I always figured if I was going to imagine that people were saying bad things about me, or to me, that I would have fun with it! My BFF has been overweight since we met. Her attitude was, "It's not a secret, nobody has to whisper about it!" When I had a mean neighbor calling me fat all the time, I would say, "DUH! My jeans are a size 18, I don't need you telling me that!" Thanks Lanie!

So, I guess you could say that I look at negativity from others as a problem with them, not with me. So THERE!

10 comments:

  1. You have such a great attitude! I love this concept - "You cannot control other people, but you can control how you respond." I remember hearing something like that years ago at a work seminar. Thanks for the reminder.

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  2. And this is why I love you! SMOOCH! MWWwAH!

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  3. When a person learns that they cannot control people, just your response they truly know they are an adult. You are especially grown-up and wonderful because you were able to get to this despite being raised by a negative father. That must have been a challenge. You do Rock! Keep it up.

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  4. You're right, I DO rock! Lanie, smooches back! Waisting Time, I have GOT to figure out how to get you on my blog roll!

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  5. You go Mandy! I love your positive attitude. Sometimes people struggle with the concept that someone else has no power over your own personal decisions, but you have nailed it! For this reason, (amongst others) I have no doubt you will be successful with your journey. :)

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  6. I think that the encouragement that I get from all of my bloddies (Blog+buddies) is instrumental in my success as well. I know I can do it, my inner voice knows I can do it, but then there are times when I doubt myself. BUT, when strangers tell me I can do it, it reminds me that I'm NOT crazy (at least about this).

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  7. Lanie's neighbor. Then 2 people agreeing with you is actually 12. Lanie has 11 people running around in there. Did you see how hot Bry is ? OMG... Never mean by the way, a little snarky. And who wouldnt agree with veggie burgers. ? Sounds delish..

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  8. Snarky can be scary sometimes! I'm just a big chicken...a really sensitive chicken! :D Still love you, Allan!

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  9. That's not mean?

    What about my neighbor? Mandy's not my neighbor, never has been. And, for the record, she's never been to Oz either. Where do you get these things? You're so silly!

    Sometimes I think Allan thinks you're talking about him when you're talking about your dad. Different mean old man, Al. We all know you're really soft-hearted.

    Mandy, you should specify SCRAWNY mean old man next time in order to avoid confusion. And remember, the lawyer said it's not stalking, it's only harassment and threatened libel/defamation . . . so far.

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  10. It's refreshing to hear someone so in tune with their inner encouragement. You're post made me smile, thanks!

    You go girl!

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